Chapter 1: Desperate Hopes

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In the hall, there were people, more people than normal. They were crowded around the doorway to grandmother's apartment. There was talk of missing children and possibly adoption for the boy, but the whispers said I myself was too old to be taken care of. I ignored these as much as I could and we got into the elevator.

Then a man came in a long black bag over one shoulder. The smell... it was grandmother being taken away somewhere. We took the ride down the elevator together. One last time I whispered a prayer to God to watch over Grandmother's soul, as I bid my last farewell to her. The man left first, never doing more than glance at us. I don't think he even noticed us standing there. Probably mistaking us for someone else's brats.

We left the apartment building, the bodies of the homeless who lingered like so many lost souls on the streets had been cleared away. Probably afraid of being arrested, there were police cars and a single dingy white car that the body was placed into. My brother skipped down the steps, we'd never really let him outside before. Grandmother had said outside was a dangerous world, a place not fit for young children. I worked the wagon down the steps, as I was working at I felt the load lighten.

I looked behind and froze, a young man in the foreign green peacekeeper's uniform was picking up one end, steadying it so that I could get it down the stairs. He smiled and with a heavy accent said, There you go, little miss run along to your friends and have fun now. He turned back into the apartment. I stared at his back. Never had anyone ever been so kind, I almost expected him to demand the blood, I almost wished he would. He had a cute face and he looked smart and strong.

I turned back around and there was my brother walking out infront of a speeding car. I dropped everything and shouted No! Time itself seemed to stop around me as my love for my brother superseded everything else. The car itself slammed on it's breaks and both of them looked at me, frozen in time for that one second that made itself all the difference in the world. My brother just touching the side of the car on his way across the street. The car driver having slowed just enough to barely miss my brother. I ran over and snatched him up out of harm's way.

I angrily scolded him, Don't do that again, don't you EVER do that again, that's bad, very, very bad... tears dripped down my face. I'd nearly lost my own brother I was angry at his own stupidity I was upset with myself for not watching him more closely.

I started to sob, I led us over to the wagon, I pulled out my backpack and I set him inside the wagon. He needed to be kept safe, I'd wear the backpack and pull the wagon and him in it. Anything to keep him safe. I towed the wagon, it was much heavier with brother in it and my arm ached but then grew numb. Foot infront of the other, we were leaving for the farms as Grandmother had said to. I knew it would take me longer, but that's where we were going to go. It's where we had to go.

As I pulled the wagon along, I thought of one of my early years when Grandma had me go to the schooling. Grandma had had a car back then. I'd seen her car, and had gone heedlessly rushing across the street, right out infront of a schoolbus. The crossing guard had grabbed me by the hood of my coat and pulled me out of harms way. Favor repaid I thought silently to myself. You saved me, I saved my brother. Someday, he'll save somebody too.

Chapter 1: Desperate Hopes

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Tasks done, I walked by grandmother's room towards the kitchen. Grandmother smelled funny, she was beginning to stink. I closed the door, that sort of helped. I made food for us, Using the last of the bread and spreading it with honey. It was sweet but we were both crying, holding each other terrified of the future that would bring we let it out, we bawled together like the children we were.

The neighbor found us first, after tapping the walls multiple times, she got up off of her fat butt and came over to see what was the matter. I opened the door, tears still running down my face. Her nose wrinkled up and she looked over to the closed door of Grandma's room.

She held my brother and me in her arms, saying oh sweet dears, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry for your loss. Wait here a moment and then you can come over to my place. She went to grandmother's room and came out with a clenched fist and she said, There, there dears, you can stay at my place for a few days, just gather your toys and come to visit.

We did as she said, there wasn't much to do, but I made a show of gathering up our pillows and blankets, folding them up onto the wagon and then we were off down the hall and into a new world.

She had us make our sleeping area on the floor of her living room, much as grandmother had. She then used her phone to make a call. She spent the day pacing around her kitchen. Around night time as we were just getting to sleep there was a knock at the door. She opened it and talked to the men there. She brought us into the room and turned on the light. The man that was with her shined a light on our faces and then the wagon we had with us. I instantly didn't like him but I said not a word, pretending to sleep. They spoke for a while then the man left.

I was awakened that morning with the sizzling smell of eggs. I hadn' t had eggs since our parents had passed away when I was seven, my brother had been in diapers still. I got up brightly and said good morning. She nodded to me and said my breakfast was over there. Burnt toast with too much butter on it. She called out and her children came running in exclaiming over the rare treat. I was angry, but I kept it to myself and saved most of the toast for brother, he wouldn't care he was always so hungry. The other children each got milk and orange juice, we got boiled water and table scraps. I was tempted to share the honey but, I was afraid too, they might take it all and leave none for me. I decided it would be better to keep it to ourselves.

Then as the children were getting ready to go off to schooling, I noticed the wagon, our backpack had been opened and rifled through, our candles were missing, the bottle of water I had paid dearly for myself, gone, and the honey yes that was all gone too. I was afraid to show concern, to look more might reveal anything else that had gone missed. But it bothered me, deep down it bothered me a lot.

Grandmother had once told me if someone did something that bothered me, I should tell her about it. But grandmother was dead now. The lady said, I have to go to work now, you two be good and stay out of trouble.

As soon as she was gone I quickly jumped down and rifled through my backpack confirming my worst suspicions. Most of my clothing was gone, she had two girls so they were probably either in their possesion now or in her possesion. Brother's clothing was still there, probably because she had no younger children. The wax candles, one out of the twelve I had made had been missed. The one that had been setting in the plastic container for making such candles.

The honey of course gone all three jars. My had felt all the way down to the bottom of the bag. In the darkness she had missed the plastic bag at the very bottom with the silks and feathers. A feather brushed my hand and I felt reassured with it's tickle. She hadn't taken everything. The side pouch had been checked but the marbles and buttons were intact. Lastly the water, I had to find it. It was precious to me, I had given up so much of myself for it, I wasn't letting her have it.

I opened the fridge. there was everything we had that belonged to us, minus one jar of honey. I took the honey, the bottle of water, the wax candles and I put them back into the backpack. Then I looked around for my clothes, I checked everywhere I could think of. They were gone. I checked my dolly clothes, still there. Red tin Caboose, yes that was still there too. I noticed a piece of paper cash sticking out from a wheel I pulled that out and then realizing more was going to come out I stuffed the rest back in. I pushed the paper into my pocket.

I packed up our things, we had been lucky today, and she had given us a safe place, but I bet anything she had stolen the last of grandma's pearls too. We had to go before she took everything we had and tossed us onto the street like used scraps of garbage. I got my brother up and held his hand. We walked out of the apartment fully dressed, I towed the wagon behind. I left the door to her apartment open. She'd done poor by us, and it was as much as she should get back.

Chapter 1: Desperate Hopes

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Water is a precious resource in the city, you got it from Unicef. Each bottle was clearly labeled. When grandmother stirred restlessly awake she poured a cup of this precious liquid. Helping grandmother sit up she helped her drink from the little plastic cup they all shared.

Grandmother coughed and said slowly, I'm dying my dear, you should, the rent's paid out until the end of the month, then your going to have to go. Take your brother and go to the farm, they might take you in there. There's some cash... Her voice broke off coughing and hacking blood she spat on her handkerchief.

Money... hidden between the loose floorboards under the rug. Take it all with you, it's yours and take care of your brother. When I die, do that first before they come. When the coroner comes, he'll assess everything in the apartment for taxes, he knows about the money under the rug. You won't have anything left to you but personal possessions. Keep the money safe don't use it for a long while, it's all I have and use it as a shelter against hard times.

Grandmother's breathing rattled and gasped. It won't be long now dear, just hold my hand and be brave with me child. Grandmother took her time dying, we held her hand, sometimes I brought my brother over to help take care of her. But when she rattled a breath he got scared and left her room. The night grandmother died we both knew it I was scolding him for using a screwdriver to pull his plastic tractor-trailer apart. We didn't hear anything we just looked at each other for a long moment, and then I ran to grandmother's side. She wasn't breathing anymore, she was gone, her body still warm. I brought my brother over and we spent the day sobbing in her room. We'd miss her, she had been so important to us.

A day after her death, I woke up in her room. I looked at her things, things I'd never been allowed to touch before. I was careful, I didn't want to break anything of hers. In a way, this is what grandmother had left me, the peace, the serenity within her room.

But that sense of peace was starting to leave me, we had to do what Grandma said. I picked up the heavy rug in the living room and tugged on it, it was big and heavy, it took me hours to drag it away. But I kept trying because that's what Grandma had told me to do. I touched the floorboards, and brother helped me. He's the one that found the loose board. We both hauled it up, inside was a gun and a lot of cash, more 'n I had ever seen in my life. We pulled it all out. There was so much of it. There was no way we'd be able to hide it all.

Then I looked over at his open truck, I began stuffing the cash into the truck, and brother even though he could barely talk caught on and helped me do it. When I couldn't fit anymore in. I put the other piece on and he handed me the screws, together we tightened the money down. Hiding it away inside the plastic mouldings of his toy truck.

We still had more money to hide so I took out my doll clothes case, I tried stuffing the money in there, but it was so obvious, anyone who opened it would find out the deception. Then I noticed the lining of the case was a little loose, I carefully tucked the rest of it beneath the lining. With any luck it would pass a casual inspection, particularly if I had it stuffed with doll clothes. I picked up my doll's clothes carefully stuffing and pushing and mashing until I had the case overwhelmingly stuffed with them. But it wasn't enough. I put in some of my brother's clothes too, his spare socks and a t shirt. He wasn't that much bigger than the size of a doll.

I was so tired from all that hard work. I lay down and closed my eyes only for a second. BBBRRRRINNNNGGggg, BBBRRRRINNNNGGggg... the phone, grandmother should get that. I rolled over expecting to see grandmother answer it but she didn't. Then I remmembered grandmother was dead. She told me never to answer it even if she wasn't there. So I didn't, I let it ring and ring until it quieted.

I got up off the floor I had fallen asleep on. Brother had closed the floorboard, and the rug was nearly in place to cover it. He was asleep on the old heavy rug. I chose not to disturb him. I went to grandmother's room. It had begun to stink of death. I didn't know what I was looking for, but then I found her little jewelry box. I knew it contained a broken necklace of white pearls. I looked inside. The necklace was over half gone from what I'd remmembered when she'd showed it to me. She'd told me it was what kept the apartment over our heads. I figured it must be another kind of money, something that was paid back in another manner. If it was worth anything the coroner would try to take it. I picked it up. The pearls slipped off the string and fell back into the drawer with a clatter like rain.

Maybe this is what grandma had meant about not touching her things. I quickly searched and found most of them. I couldn't string them back on the string itself was too frayed to do it. I put three of the pearls back in the box, that should pay for anything necessary. They always did. I put the rest of the pearls in my pocket for now, then as I thought about it, I got my bag of marbles out. It was really a mix of glass beads, marbles, and other round objects such as buttons. It also contained dice that my parents had once owned. The only legacy they had left to me. I poured out the contents of the bag on one side of the bed, pouring the pearls in and then putting everything back on top. The angular glass dice, the marbles, glass beads, bits of string and lint.

I eagerly looked through grandmother's other things, being careful to memorize what everything looked like before and to put it back much the same way. Little glass creatures inhabited one small cabinet while a single white rose encased in solid plastic was at the bottom of a drawer filled with marvelous and beautiful scarves. Grandmother had never shown me these before, and I took out each unfolding and marveling at their brilliant colors. Bright reds, purples, golds, colors I didn't know to describe and an outfit with strange feathers decorating it. I decided in that moment that everything grandmother had was now mine to do with as I pleased. The outfit was made for a taller woman like grandmother, but I hadn't full grown yet myself.

I packed up the whole thing in one of the plastic bags grandmother kept in the kitchen, I then put it in my backpack, and then over top I put my regular clothes and my brother's. Squishing all that down, I then took the water bottle packed that into one side of the backpack and several jars of honey and topped it all with hand-made wax candles. The backpack was now full to almost straining. I then took my marbles and put them in a side pouch. I packed it all into the little red plastic wagon. My dolly case and my brother's toy truck. It all just barely fit and brother would have to walk. I towed the little wagon off to one side of the room.